Fear, generally thought to be an inhibitor, can also be a motivator. In a time of danger, fear can help to keep us alive. Parents sometimes use fear to help protect their children: never take candy from strangers, for example. But it is fear as an inhibitor that I will discuss today.
Although there are many fears, the three I will discuss are fear of death, fear that we will make a mistake and fear of what others will think of us. When analyzed, none of these fears make any sense and our lives would be better if we didn’t have them.
Intellectually, we understand that we are going to die, so why do we fear death? It is the unknown nature of when and how it will occur that seems most troubling to many folks. Logically, fearing something that one has no control over makes no sense.
Again from an intellectual standpoint, there isn’t disagreement that we all make mistakes. Since there’s no such thing as a perfect human, why fear making a mistake? Well, just because we all make mistakes doesn’t mean they don’t have ramifications. Some mistakes cost money, while others could cost relationships.
Related to life insurance, it has been my experience that many people fail to act for fear of making a mistake. Granted, there are many options regarding life insurance and some of them can be complex. But in virtually all cases, failing to act is a much, much bigger mistake than making a “wrong” choice.
I have only delivered a handful of death claims in my career, but never did the beneficiary ask “what was the internal rate of return on this policy?” I would venture to guess that that question has rarely, if ever, been asked. Why? Because it doesn’t matter! The beneficiary is just happy to have a sum of money to deal with the financial problems that death invariably creates.
The last fear on the list is fear of what others think of us. Like the fear of death, this is something that we have no control over. People are going to think what they are going to think, and it is a gross misunderstanding of human behavior to think that we can change that. For as Jacob M. Baude said, “Consider how hard it is to change yourself and you'll understand what little chance you have in trying to change others.”
I relate this fear to a gentleman I met who was getting ready retire. I was reviewing his life insurance and complimented him on having the foresight to acquire a whole life policy over thirty years ago. He said “Do you really think so?” It seems he took quite a ribbing from some colleagues when he took it out, and thirty plus years later, he still wasn’t 100% sure he made the right decision, even though it was completely paid up and the insurance company was paying him an annual dividend!
Yes, fears can be debilitating, if we let them. But by calmly, rationally and logically addressing them, they need not be. And never let the fear of making a mistake stop you from protecting your loved ones.